The Headless Columnist

I read the opinion columnists in the paper every day. It's a great way to find out what news I missed or what is really important. These people are our society's experts. They tell us what to think. I want to be an opinion columnist.

Well, I used to. Then, I started looking at their pictures and it struck me. These people are getting their heads chopped off, every day, in public.

I don't mean figuratively by the people who disagree with them. That I don't mind, and is actually kind of fun. I mean literally getting their heads chopped off. Well, at least the tops of their heads.

Look at the headshots at the tops of their columns. The top of the head is sliced clean off. Every one, I mean every single one. It's not a liberal bias thing; it applies to everybody most liberal to most conservative. It's not to hide the bald spot. It's men and women both.

Perhaps it has something to do with allowing all of us in the general public full access to their gray matter. Reach in and grab a handful of 's pulsing lobes. 's cerebrum oozes between your fingers. Experience , neuron by neuron. Compare 's thalamus to 's hypothalamus.

Well, I've mulling over for a while whether I need a headshot on this site. And I've decided, I need to prove that I'm not like all of them. So, for all of you who have been asking, here I am, in all my headshot glory:

Mike Ellis

Insomnia Log