Vice President Makes Easy Mistake -- or Was It?

It's not like you wouldn't have done the same thing. Perhaps Vice President Cheney simply mistook attorney Harry Whittington for his prey. They've shown the same doctored photo of Whittington in all the news media, so it may not be obvious how this could happen. However, I've discovered this picture of Cheney's victim in an old family album, and it becomes clear why it was such an easy mistake.

Harry Whittington relaxing on his family's ranch.

I've also discovered evidence that Cheney's actions may not have been accidental after all. In fact, according to an unnamed White House source, this was actually the first concrete step in the Bush administration's new "War on Chimeras", announced in the recent State of the Union speech. In that speech, Bush asked Congress to outlaw "human-animal hybrids". Clearly, Whittington was meant as an example in this new campaign.

So, which was it? Simple mistake based on resemblance between hunting partner and hunting target? Or, a vicious, unprovoked attack on one of the quail people? I think it is time for civil rights legislation to protect the multi-species-enabled. As Dan Quayle, the former Vice President of the Hybrid Anti-defamation League and Friends (HALF) said, "We're Frail! We're Quail! Get used to it!"